Choosing Your Bridal Party: 6 Quick Tips
Weddings involve decisions. A lot of them. From cake to food to attire, your head will spin with joy and perhaps a touch of stress. The one selection impacting the trajectory of the day might not be what you think… choosing your bridal party will be a big decision and will ultimately impact your day directly! You can take a few steps to ensure you make the right decisions when it comes to choosing your bridal party.
Nail Down What Exactly You Want
Let’s get this point out of the way: while there are some things that are considered wedding traditions, like the cake cutting or bouquet toss, there is nothing, absolutely nothing that is set in stone. That includes bridal parties.
Maybe you’re gung-ho about having a huge bridal party with twelve attendants surrounding you. Having those twelve people around you may be a dream come true…For someone else, that scene would be enough to send them into a panic attack.
Ask yourself this simple question: do I want a bridal party? If you’re voting no to the bridal party, then you can stop reading here and go grab a coffee or something. But if you do want attendees, you have a bit more to think about.
Consider Your Options
When it comes to the wedding, there is really only one question you have to ask yourself to figure out who you want in your bridal party: who do I want standing beside me as I marry the love of my life?
Siblings, friends, and other family members usually make up the bridal party. Don’t forget to select a flower girl or ring bearer if you are going that route. You can throw tradition to the wind on this one, like this bride did when she invited her grandmas to be the flower girls!
Be sure to choose people you can have fun with like the groom and his best man in this photo!
Have That Internal Debate
Where selecting your bridal party gets tricky is when there’s not a clear-cut line on who to ask. Maybe you have three sisters, but you really only are super close with one. Or what if your partner has siblings, and you’re unsure if they should be in your bridal party? How do you navigate this situation?
The selections for the bridal party are difficult! Take your time and think it through. There is no right or wrong answer. If you value a person’s opinion, definitely take it. If you feel like you can’t make a decision without really hurting someone’s feelings, consider having a group of friends you get ready with and only one attendant to stand up with you.
Consider Your Prospective Bridal Party’s Responsibilities
While you might think you’re doing your best friend an honor by inviting her to be in your bridal party, it might be enough to push her over the edge if she is swamped with other life happenings.
Before you extend the invitation, think about your friends’ other obligations. Yeah, you may want your best college friend to be at your engagement party, bachelorette party, rehearsal dinner and wedding and to be your Maid of Honor… BUT if she just had another kiddo, is finishing law school, working part-time and lives across the country, chances are, being in your bridal party will just want to make her rip her hair out (unless she already feels that way… then it will just magnify that feeling).
There are responsibilities that go with being a bridal party member, so try not to bequeath that responsibility to just anyone.
Realize Bridal Party Sides Do Not Need To Be Even
Often times the bride and groom don't have the same number of close friends or siblings. Don't fear...there's no need to have the same number on each side. Rather than just picking random friends to fill in, just go with your gut and choose your closest friends, even if you do end up with 3 more bridesmaids than groomsmen.
Also, we've been seeing a lot of couples incorporate both men and women on each side rather than keeping it traditional with only female bridesmaids and male groomsmen. If you're a bride and your best friend is male, there's no reason you can't have him be your man of honor!
Spell Out Your Expectations... Even If You Don’t Have Any
One of the biggest concerns we hear from our brides is, “I don’t want to be a Bridezilla!” And that’s totally understandable. Demanding is much different than requesting politely, and we’re glad you understand the difference. But did you know being indecisive and TOO laid back is also grounds for creating rifts in the bridal party?
You may be okay with the bridesmaids wearing whatever, but be sure to give them SOME direction. You have to have at least some type of opinion. Otherwise, confusion will ensue. You could end up with a bridesmaid in puke green, too, if you let them have free reign. Tread carefully with being too demanding AND too laid-back.
What are your concerns with choosing your bridal party? Comment below to fill us in, and we’ll give you some advice!